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    „Ansichtssache“

    Hallo zusammen,
    ich habe etwas geschrieben und bin auf der Suche nach Feedback.
    Das Ganze spielt in einem bekannten SciFi-Universum - welches das allerdings ist, ist eine Überraschung ziemlich am Ende.
    Jetzt kommen ein paar Haken...
    zunächst ist der Text bislang auf englisch geschrieben - über das sprachliche Niveau lasse ich mich lieber nicht aus :-)
    Übersetzt habe ich es noch nicht, weil es EIGENTLICH noch keine fertige Geschichte ist - bislang ist es streckenweise eher ein aufgehübschtes Plot-Outline, es gibt praktisch keine Protagonisten. Übersetzen wollte ich es, wenn es fertig ist - im Moment schreibe ich immer mal wieder Teile um.
    Es ist schon mehr als ein trockener Bericht, aber auch keine richtige Geschichte. In etwa so wie David Webers Passagen, in denen er Hintergründe erläutert.
    Der Techno-Faktor ist auch ziemlich hoch.

    Falls Ihr euch fragt „warum zum Henker schreibt der Kerl auf englisch...?“: das hängt mit dem Universum zusammen - ich hatte die ersten Stadien in einem einschlägigen Forum für dieses Setting geschrieben - und die Community ist zu 98% nicht deutschsprachig.
    Dort kam es nicht gut an - es hat zu lange gedauert, bis klar wurde, dass es tatsächlich in diesem speziellen Universum spielt und wurde als „generic SciFi, post it somewhere else!“ abgehakt.
    Der eine oder andere hat sich auch über eine vermeintliche, verkappte politische Diskussion aufgeregt.

    also... hier posten?

    #2
    Solange deine Geschichte nicht gegen die Forenregeln sowie gängiges Recht verstößt, bin ich mir recht sicher das du auch eine Geschichte in englisch posten kannst. Für die meisten hier ist englisch kein großes Problem. Nachvollziehbar sollte sie jedoch schon sein. Ein "vorprogrammiertes" gutes Feedback gibts natürlich nicht, allerdings sollte man natürlich schon so fair sein und die damit verbundene Arbeit des Autors würdigen.
    Nebenbei: Ich hätte auch Schwierigkeiten in einer anderen Sprache längere Texte zu verfassen.
    Zuletzt geändert von Infinitas; 25.12.2018, 14:22.
    Das letzte Treffen der Generationen in Wien war übrigens BOMBE ! Picards Moralkiste:"Schurken, die ihre Schnurrbärte zwirbeln, sind leicht zu erkennen, aber diejenigen, die sich in gute Taten kleiden, sind hervorragend getarnt."

    Kommentar


      #3
      Na dann mal los - Teil 1 von (bisher) 3.
      Gebt mir einen Tip, wenn ich da unabsichtlich eine Regel verletze - die ich übersehen habe :-)



      Part 1 - Leaving home

      2083 was the year humanity began to anticipate its approaching end. It was the year when Hubble IV detected something new in the solar system. Something that came from outer space crossing the solar system. That something turned out to be a small exoplanet. The passing of the traveller resulted in excitement, once the first shock had been overcome and once it turned out that it was no direct threat to earth, since it would pass in a safe distance of half an AE. Science was thrilled - and the traveller was the target of a whole armada of manned and unmanned expeditions. In the end, it was just a rather boring piece of rock, ice and Helium. However... it was large enough to drag a significant part of the asteroid belt between Mars and Jupiter with it. And this tail of thousands of rocks turned into a cloud that tumbled through the inner solar system.

      2083 was the year in which the first small asteroids hit earth and crashed in the atlantic ocean. The resulting tsunami spared the american continents - but it washed away all tracks of humanity from the canarian islands, cleared the north african west coast and Portugal. Of course, the tsunami was only one aspect of the catastrophe. Seismic effects, short term climatic changes from clouds and dust in the atmosphere, long term changes due to the effect on the gulf stream...

      This impact would have long term consequences beyond the first half billion victims. And sooner or later, more impacts would occur. Impacts of larger asteroids.
      It happened sooner.

      By 2095, three more asteroids had hit earth, 4 more passed earth much too close.
      Attempts to destroy approaching asteroids showed mixed success. The second and the third asteroid absorbed the majority of nuclear warheads earth could muster and had armed orbital defense satellites with. The second asteroid was again a rather small one and was blown to small pieces that rained down as in comparism harmless boulders. The third one was too large and at least broke down to pieces that at least only resulted in catastrophes - and not total destruction.
      It became clear that attempts to blow the asteroids apart could only reduce the degree of destruction, but not avoid it. It was just a way to buy time, but destruction seemed inevitable.
      If humanity was to survive, it would not be on earth.
      Colonization of space seemed to be the only solution.

      Earth by the mid of the 21st century looked in a discomforting way similar to how it looked a century ago. An increasing degree of nationalism, cold war in the rise again and again a highly instable south american and african continent. What economic progress the nations there had achieved was overcompensated by climate change and political and ideological instability. If something had inhabited the traveller, it would have encountered a world with several competing blocks. The European Union had survived a phase of downsizing and was eventually refounded as a Federal Republic, much like the United States used to be and even more resembling the german republic. However, the borders had expanded to the North African coast which functioned as a heavily guarded border region and at the same time a belt of solar power plants. With almost drained petrol depots, the arabic world steadily descended back to the state it inherited prior the petrol age. The asian demisphere was dominated by 3 powers - the russian empire, the chinese federation and the United Protectorates of America which covered most of the pacific nations that refused to be consumed by chinese expansion. No need to say that the UPAs territory covered the whole north american continent and about half of the south american. What was left effectively worked as a giant ghetto where UPA citizens that had lost their civil rights had been exiled. Canada had at first associated with the FSE - until it was krimed by the UPA.

      Code:
      (krimed had at that time become a term that refers to the first russian expansion.
      Continuing with this method later led to the russian empire - whose borders resembled
      those of the UDSSR and that expanded further and further in FSE-territory.)
      The Traveller would have seen a world just one step away from a hot war between the russian empire and the FSE. Protection from the UPA was possible and not without precedence - but since 2025 every intervention came at the cost of sovereignity. The Exit of the USA from the NATO marked the rise of the UPA. 2112 was the year in which the last political block had started the construction of the first colonization ships in earth or moon orbit. The FSE had built a fortified space port on the devastated and uninhabited canary Islands, since it had no more access to the Space Ports in Cape Caneveral, Baikonur or even the former ESA-Site.

      All of the colonization expeditions faced common problems.

      Where to go?
      So far, no other inhabitable planet was known to mankind - there only had been a couple of destinations with a certain chance to find a planet fit for colonization. Once started, the trip would be a one-shot. If the destination turns out to be uninhabitable, chances that fuel will suffice to go somewhere else are close to non existent. The reason for that was quite simple... slowing down takes as much time and fuel as it took to speed up... and building up the speed for interstellar travel would require years to accelerate.
      Even if the planet provides basic conditions that allow for colonization, that does not mean that no terraforming will be required. As a consequence, each expedition will need at least the capabilities to initiate terraforming - and to set up a colony that is able to survive even under conditions that will only eventually allow human survival.

      Whom to take along?
      Each block started with one ship - and chances were good that this would be the only ship that would get the opportunity to leave earth. One of the largest problems regarding the population was to ensure support for the mission. A mission that was not intended to evacuate the people, but to give humanity the opportunity for survival. On the cognitive level, it was apparent that each block would only be able to send a few thousand people - as opposed to billions of citizens. A few thousands also would be required to ensure a suffitienty diverse genetic pool to allow the population to survive. In addition, not only genetic but also educational diversity is required. Scientists, engineers, all kinds of crafters. But this lead to a couple of other problems. A certain degree of colonists already needed to have the required skills - and almost all skills needed to be available. On the other hand, depending on the kind of ship, those specialists would need to survive the trip, so they needed to be relatively young.

      How to survive the trip?
      In each and any scenario, the voyage would last centuries, maybe millenia. That alone leaves only two alternatives- generation ships or hibernation. Generation ships of course have a much higher need for room, life support systems and supplies. In addition, they bear the risk that the colonists adapt too much to life in space and maybe even loose the abilities required later. After all, those skills would have no practical use on the trip and would need to be given down from generation to generation.
      Hence, UPA and FSE decided to research hibernation techniques. China went for a generation ship - in part due to access to almost unlimited building supplies from the mining facilities on the moon. The russian solution was still not decided upon when the other three ships finally left earth.

      The decision about what to research was something worth mentioning - because none of the blocks had the technologies required for colonization when they began building the ships. They started with what they knew and the design and capabilities evolved with scientific progress. There was not really another choice - building a single ship would take at least ten years and no one was willing to take the risk to begin only when every problem was already solved. In the end, "at least ten years" became 17 years.

      What drive to use?
      A chemical drive was out of the question due to the massive requirements of fuel and no practical way to replace used fuel on the trip.
      Informal and involuntary knowledge exchange finally led to all ships using the same drive technology. Fusion technology was finally available and provided both an energy source for the ship and a drive. Since Hydrogen and Helium are both fit as fuel and have at least a chance to be found somewhere on the way, the solution appeared practical.

      The FSE eventually found a combined solution for the problems of survival on the journey and the required education of the limited number of colonists. Stuffed deeply away in a drawer with useless inventions was a technique for direct neural knowledge induction. Basically, it allowed to let a person to learn while asleep. At the time of the first practical demonstration, it was awarded with a Nobel Price. Afterwards, it went directly to the drawer due to extreme inefficiency - the process was so slow that transporting the equivalent of 1 page of plain text information took about 20 hours with some tolerance depending on the recipient. Transfer of motoric skills took extremely longer. As a matter of fact, that technology was pretty useless - with a few exceptions that quickly became illegal in the FSE. With the development of an hibernation technique that let the subject sleep in a state similar to a coma while reducing vital functions to an absolute minimum, the neural induction was dug out again. Time was no limiting factor in this case and the formerly useless method became a practical solution.
      It was Common Sense that the ultimate priority of each expedition was to set up a colony that was able to survive on its own. Hence, every ship was required to carry the equipment to quickly set up industrial capacity for mining and refinery.

      However, at this time the UPA had already followed a doctrine first implemented in the early 21st century that allowed a different approach. In a nutshell, the argumentation was that the UPA had ensured peace, freedom and democracy in the world for about a century, so it was deemed only fair if it claims compensation for that role. A reduction of industrial equipment allowed for more american citizens to be taken along. The know-how in those areas was inferior anyway - natural resources on UPA Territory had been depleted decades ago and almost any sophisticated civil technology had been imported for a long time. Local products concentrated on the traditional sectors of information technologies and military equipment. Almost every other industry was still existent, but everybody who could afford it chose Chinese or European products. Since nobody could see a reason why a colony would need weapons - beyond hunting equipment - no expedition wasted space, fuel and training on weapons. Wasted. The UPA did not intend to waste any of it. The weapons and specialized personnel they made room for in their ship were an investment in American citizens future.

      In early 2127, the UPA ship „Ranger“ was the first to leave earth orbit. Its destination had been kept secret - for good reason. The trip was extremely short - „Ranger“ flew no further than Mars. Mars would have made a poor alternative to earth for colonization - not only because of the required terraforming, but also because Mars was just like earth subject to continuous asteroid bombardment. But Mars was not „Rangers“ destination. „Ranger“ waited in Mars orbit.

      The summer of 2127 saw the start of the FES ship named „Daedalus“. As its destination, the Trapist-1 system in the Aquarius-sector had been chosen. With 7 planets resembling earth - as far as scientists could tell - it bore the best chances for founding a colony. With a distance of just 40 light years, the system was also extremely close. It seemed unfair - and from an objective perspective it actually was. Trapist-1 would have been the best choice for any ship, but due to the short distance it should have been the destination for the chinese generation ship. But building of that ship had not yet been completed and FSE was not willing to give up that opportunity. There was no price for good sportsmanship in this competition after all. If diplomacy and intelligence was to be trusted, „Ranger“ did not go to Trapist-1 as well.

      „Daedalus“ did not set direct course. To build up speed, a complicated course from one gravitational field of solar systems planets to another was much more efficient - though, longer. And due to the positions of Mars and Jupiter also predictable.

      There was one unique field of technology the UPA researched with maximum priority: The means to detect and follow a space ship. When „Daedalus“ performed its slingshot maneuver around Mars onwards to Jupiter, „Ranger“ picked up the track and followed unnoticed by „Daedalus“, whose every maneuver was analyzed and mimicked ever after by „Ranger“.
      „Daedalus“ left the solar system, all the time under full thrust of the fusion drive. Acceleration lasted for 5 years, until the drive could not increase velocity any more. The engine was shut down and „Daedalus“ fell towards Trapist-1 at 0.6c.

      „Ranger“ followed.

      At home, humanity finally found a way to avert destruction. Ironically, the further development of the fusion drive led to the solution of the asteroid threat and earths destruction was postponed for a few millennia. „Daedalus“ and „Ranger“ never learned about it - which would also have been pointless, because fuel would have sufficed to slow down, but not to build up speed for returning.

      Kommentar


        #4
        So im Überflug ist das doch ein gutes Skript. Gut man kann tatsächlich über einige phantasie-politische Entwicklungen diskutieren, das gab es allerdings auch schon bei den Großen ( z.B. Seaquest ). Als Roman gehts noch nicht durch aber als Grundgerüst ist das schon eine enorm gute Leistung und auch nachvollziehbar zu lesen. Manche ( bei weitem nicht alle ) Amerikaner mögen halt "no no politics" was mir auch schon aufgefallen ist. Mich hingegen stört soetwas überhaupt nicht, da ich solche Szenarien bereits als Kind mit dem Nachbarn , in vereinfachter Form auf der Straße gespielt habe . - Und das sind nun wirklich noch keine hochtrabenden politischen Ansichten.
        Das letzte Treffen der Generationen in Wien war übrigens BOMBE ! Picards Moralkiste:"Schurken, die ihre Schnurrbärte zwirbeln, sind leicht zu erkennen, aber diejenigen, die sich in gute Taten kleiden, sind hervorragend getarnt."

        Kommentar


          #5
          Danke, das höre ich gerne :-)
          Teil 2 kommt auch kurzfristig.
          was haltet Ihr von einer Runde „wir spekulieren mal wild, was da noch kommt“?
          Bisher ist es natürlich nahezu aussichtslos darauf zu schließen, in welchem Setting es endet - aber vielleicht kommt ja jemand darauf, wie es weitergeht.
          Muss nicht, wenn ihr keine Lust habt :-)

          Kommentar


            #6
            Und weiter geht's.
            Gleich vorab eine Warnung - in Teil 2 gibt es etwas, was ich nicht erklären kann. Meine Irrfahrer verstehen es natürlich auch nicht - sie müssen einfach nur mit den Folgen leben. Und für den kleinen "Deus ex Machina" am Ende von Teil 2 entschuldige ich mich jetzt schon.

            Part 2 - Odyssey
            Something else was going on as well that the colonists were not aware of. The 5 years of acceleration had been determined in earth time. On the ships, the high velocity interfered with the passing of time and the situation was different. At that time only 4 years had passed so far. Now that both were traveling at 0.6c, time dilatation would mean that 2 years on earth would equal mere 15 months on the ships. An increase of speed also increases the dilatation factor. That factor was increased significantly 50 years later, when the ship KI awakened the „Daedalus“-crew. Nothing apparent had changed - no damage to the ship, no imminent danger. What had changed was the velocity. No one ever found out why and how, but the situation was that velocity had increased to 2.4c. Which meant that Trapist-1 would not be reached.

            First, because „Daedalus“ fuel reserves would not allow the ship to reduce speed sufficiently.
            Second, because even if fuel would suffice, „Daedalus“ would be far beyond Trapist-1 once velocity even went below 1c. Approximately 220 light years too far.
            Third, the fusion drive would not even work at all to slow the ship down. A fusion drive emits particles at light speed. Firing it in driving direction would usually work to slow it down… but not when traveling above light speed. To make the drive work, it would require particles to be emitted faster than the ships own speed.

            The only thing that could be done was to utilize the drive to make amendments to the course.
            But where to go?
            Only a degree away from the current course and 610 lightyears ahead shone the Helix Nebula - also known as the eye of god. Hope was to find 2 powers there that might at least reduce the dire situation:

            1. inertia
            Nebula often feature a comparatively high density of Helium and Hydrogen particles. Besides an opportunity to refill the fuel depots there with the particle collectors that each of the fusion driven ships was equipped with, it might also help to slow down the ship. Particle collectors are basically circular sails of molecular-thin, self healing tissue with a diameter of 5 km. Provided that particle density would not exceed a critical degree and not too many particles larger and heavier that Helium, the continuous impact on the ship might eventually slow it down.

            2. gravity
            Back in the solar system, the slingshot maneuver allowed „Daedalus“ to build up speed. The same principle could be used to slow down the ship. However, the high velocity required something stronger than a planets gravity field. Something strong enough to have an effect on something as fast as light or faster - in theory.
            Something like the black hole in the center of the nebula.

            It is difficult to say how long „Daedalus“ and „Ranger“ spent circling around the center of the eye of god in a close, but safe distance to the event horizon. Ship time indicated 124 years, but the effects of speed-induced time dilatation now were multiplied by an unknown factor with the effects of the massive gravity field.

            The „Daedalus“ crew was awakened again when velocity finally fell below 1c. At this point, all the crew could do was guessing in which direction to continue. The nebula itself was uninhabitable. Due to radiation across the whole spectrum, everything outside was invisible, so all they could hope for was to exit the nebula in a direction that did not deviate too far away from a system with an inhabitable planet.

            They had an amount of good luck that happens only in stories. The course that spat them out of the nebula needed some adjustment, but eventually after additional 180 years of ship time took them to a system they otherwise would never had chosen, but provided everything they needed. First, 2 planets in the comfortable zone of a star resembling the sun at home. The other 5 planets had no features worth mentioning. What WAS worth mentioning was the fact that not only the planets circled around the star - the star featured a circular movement as well. A movement around an invisible spot in a far distance. In cosmic terms, a very fast movement that indicated that that spot can only be another singularity.

            But without any other choice, „Daedalus“ made use of the gravitational circumstances and began exploration of the two possible planets. Eventually „Ranger“ arrived as well and took a waiting and observing position in a safe distance outside the system. 15 years. That long would „Ranger“ wait and give „Daedalus“ time to explore, to set up a working colony and to overcome the expected early difficulties. Then they would take over.

            Kommentar


              #7
              Sehr interessant wo bei mir noch nicht ganz klar ist warum die Hohe Geschwindigkeit den Lauf der Zeit stört. Ich hingegen denke der Faktor Glück gehört zum Leben , zum Geschäft und natürlich auch in Geschichten auf einem gewissen Tech-Level. Wie gesagt die Geschichte ist nicht schlecht, ich bin gespannt, wie es weiter geht. Den Helixnebel (das Auge Gottes) ist übrigens aus dem Gerücht entstanden, dass es nur alle 3000 Jahre sichtbar sei. Den Helixnebel gibt es wirklich, nur hat er nichts mit dem Auge Gottes zu tun sondern stellt das Endstadium eines Sterns dar, der sich vor dem Zusammenfall zu einem Weißen Zwerg, noch einmal "erhebt" und Gas von seiner Oberfläche ins All bläst. Sein Hauptring umfasst ca. 2 Lichtjahre und ist der Erde recht nah. - ......... "Helixauge" ( NGC 7293 ).
              Ich denke schon das deine Geschichte hier den ein oder anderen Interessieren könnte.
              Zuletzt geändert von Infinitas; 26.12.2018, 07:23.
              Das letzte Treffen der Generationen in Wien war übrigens BOMBE ! Picards Moralkiste:"Schurken, die ihre Schnurrbärte zwirbeln, sind leicht zu erkennen, aber diejenigen, die sich in gute Taten kleiden, sind hervorragend getarnt."

              Kommentar


                #8
                Nach allem, was ich recherchiert habe, sind Helixnebel und „Auge Gottes“ identisch - es waren zwar 3 Quellen, aber das heißt natürlich nicht, dass das zwangsläufig stimmt. Warum das Ding „Auge Gottes“ heißt versteht man sehr gut, wenn man Bilder davon sieht.
                Edit: Das mit dem schwarzen Loch im Nebel ist allerdings frei erfunden
                Die Theorie, dass sich für ein sich sehr schnell bewegendes Objekt die subjektive Zeit verlangsamt, ist übrigens sehr verbreitet. Sowohl in SciFi als auch realer Physik. Aber wie gesagt - Theorie.

                Mit Teil 2 ist das Vorgeplänkel auch abgeschlossen. In Teil 3 geht‘s dann rund - einen vierten und einen Epilog gibts auch noch, Teil 4 schreibe ich nur gerade komplett neu... und wird wohl in 2 Teile gesplittet.

                Teil 3 kommt im Lauf des Tages.
                Zuletzt geändert von ED-209; 26.12.2018, 10:16.

                Kommentar


                  #9
                  Part 3 - Utgard
                  The outermost of the two potentially inhabitable planets turned out to contain the jackpot and was named Utgard - after the mythical realm beyond. The climate was slightly colder than on earth average with polar caps covering a quarter of the surface. Two continents were located in the equatorial plane and featured in the warmest regions a climate resembling the circumstances in canada and southern scandinavia. Mild summers, harsh winters. With much tolerance and a high degree of wishful thinking, one might even have recognized parallels in the flora of those regions. The Fauna resembled in a similar remote way that of earths fauna during pleistocene.

                  The inner planetary candidate was less inhabitable and could best be described as a grey tinted version of Mars with an atmosphere of nitrogen and sulfur. The name Niflheim seemed appropriate.
                  Like back on earth, the sun was just called „the sun“ by the „Daedalus“ colonists, though officially it was given the name Hall. The close black hole was given an name fitting its destructive and eventually inevitable power: Ragnarök

                  The „Daedalus“-colonists began building the colony and at the same time disassembling „Daedalus“. Mining and refinery equipment stored for centuries were landed, the hull provided material for the first buildings and the fusion drive provided energy. When „Ranger“ awoke after the 15 years of board time and set course on Utgard, not much was left of once mighty „Daedalus“.

                  A first scout shuttle was sent down in the atmosphere at night to provide reconnaissance for the coming invasion. Localising the Daedalus settlements was easier than expected - the colonists had built a much larger infrastructure in the equatorial region of one of three continents on more locations than should have been anticipated for mere 15 years. The colony consisted of several small settlements in three clusters with one large settlement in the center of each cluster and villages getting smaller with growing distance from those centers. Taking the number and sizes of those settlements into account and even with a significant tolerance, Ranger operations command could not help but make significant corrections to the estimations on Utgards population. „Daedalus“ had transported approximately 3.000 colonists - but the infrastructure based estimations indicated at least 8.000 adults, maybe 12.000.

                  That would require changes to the operational parameters. Especially retaining peace and controlling the Daedalus colonists would get much more difficult. Even unarmed colonists are hard to keep under control if in large enough numbers. Civil rights would be reserved for „Ranger“ personnel anyway - the „Daedalus“ colonists would have to endure a few more restrictions then. Given the dimensions in population estimations, even a reduction of population seemed necessary. The infrastructure was very likely to survive a period of reduced usage or mothballing until the newcomers population would catch up with it.

                  Infrastructure… well, there was another anomaly. There seemed to be two categories of settlements. The smaller settlements looked pretty much as expected - housing for a few dozen people surrounded by cultivated farmland, sometimes smaller production facilities of some kind.

                  Larger settlements, however, looked different. First, in addition to the housing found in smaller settlements large enough for a family, there were always also rows of much larger buildings. Only a few of those could be classified as warehouses or production facilities, most seemed to be housing for a larger number of inhabitants. Common to all those larger settlements was also a large square of open space adjacent to one or more of the larger houses. That square always had a side length of approximately 100 yards. Another feature common to all those settlements were light fortifications with fences and watch towers. Ranger analysts came to the conclusion that both features indicated the presence of local predators from which livestock needs protection and that the building next to the squares would most likely be stables instead of housing for settlers. The question why the smaller settlements featured no similar protection remained unanswered,
                  At the same time, those fortifications indicated the presence of more light arms than assumed before.

                  The center of the colony cluster farthest to the west was chosen for first annexation. It seemed suitable as a beach head. 2 companies seemed sufficient to encourage unarmed colonists to comply with a change of management. In fact, it appeared more like an overkill - meant as a statement of discouragement.

                  According to the plan the strike force would make a parachute assault. The square looked like the perfect place for the troopers to enter the settlement at night. The guardians expected to be on the towers would not expect an attack from inside. The only concern and subject of mocking between the troopers was who would land in cow dung.

                  ——

                  „Alpha Three-Twelve for Alpha Three.“
                  „Alpha Three. What’s up Hendricks?“
                  „Sarge… can’t help it, but that does not look like a paddock to me… more like… a drill ground. And those buildings…“
                  „I see what you mean. Look like barracks. We’ll know in 20 seconds.“

                  Hendricks was right - and sergeant Donovans was too. Exactly 20 seconds later Alpha and Beta company landed on the drill ground. A drill ground suddenly illuminated by flood lights. What kind of moron could confuse a concrete covered drill ground with a paddock? 6 seconds later heavy machine guns on the towers opened fire on the soldiers. Twelve seconds later the surviving 42 „Rangers“ had taken cover between the buildings and called for immediate evacuation. They had so far already learned a few things reconnaissance had failed to notice.

                  For example a clear strip of at least 15 yards between the fence and the closest buildings. There was also a fence dividing the settlements in three segments, allowing passage through guarded gates. The closest gate was the place where the „Rangers“ made first contact with enemy soldiers. Soldiers. As surprising as that realization came, 35 „Rangers“ broke through. The uniforms the guards wore strung a chord somewhere in the memory related to history lessons at school back on earth. At that time, the barracks behind spat out the reinforcements and the paratroopers were quickly outnumbered. They ran, ran through the second district and around the next corner… and around another one. One man stumbled out of a door, tired, confused and afraid. The „Rangers“ seized him and took him along. 32 made it to the free space where the shuttles landed to pick them up. 28 survived… 28 of 200. Some of them uninjured.

                  Kommentar


                    #10
                    Zitat von ED-209 Beitrag anzeigen
                    Nach allem, was ich recherchiert habe, sind Helixnebel und „Auge Gottes“ identisch - es waren zwar 3 Quellen, aber das heißt natürlich nicht, dass das zwangsläufig stimmt. Warum das Ding „Auge Gottes“ heißt versteht man sehr gut, wenn man Bilder davon sieht.
                    Edit: Das mit dem schwarzen Loch im Nebel ist allerdings frei erfunden
                    Die Theorie, dass sich für ein sich sehr schnell bewegendes Objekt die subjektive Zeit verlangsamt, ist übrigens sehr verbreitet. Sowohl in SciFi als auch realer Physik. Aber wie gesagt - Theorie.

                    Mit Teil 2 ist das Vorgeplänkel auch abgeschlossen. In Teil 3 geht‘s dann rund - einen vierten und einen Epilog gibts auch noch, Teil 4 schreibe ich nur gerade komplett neu... und wird wohl in 2 Teile gesplittet.

                    Teil 3 kommt im Lauf des Tages.
                    Jep das Auge wird auch noch so genannt ,meine Absicht war eher darüber aufzuklären warum es so genannt wird.

                    Der Helixnebel (NGC 7293), ist etwa 700 Lichtjahre entfernt und befindet sich im Sterbild Wassermann. Die Europäische Südsternwarte hat nun ein beeindruckendes Bild des "Auges der Helix" veröffentlicht. Manche sagen dazu auch, es sei Das Auge Gottes, nachdem ein Bild, das mit dem Hubble-Teleskop 2003 gemacht wurde, im Netz zirkulierte und – fälschlich – gesagt wurde, man könne dieses "Auge" nur alle 3000 Jahre sehen..
                    Quelle Heise.de/ Telepolis und snoopes.com.

                    Natürlich versteht man sehr gut warum der Nebel so ein "Augenblick" zu sein scheint.

                    Klicke auf die Grafik für eine vergrößerte Ansicht  Name: Helixnebel_Sternbild-Wassermann_08.png Ansichten: 1 Größe: 327,2 KB ID: 4513997


                    Zitat von ED-209 Beitrag anzeigen

                    Die Theorie, dass sich für ein sich sehr schnell bewegendes Objekt die subjektive Zeit verlangsamt, ist übrigens sehr verbreitet. Sowohl in SciFi als auch realer Physik. Aber wie gesagt - Theorie.

                    Teil 3 kommt im Lauf des Tages.
                    Ja hab schon vermutet das es hierbei um eine greifbare Theorie handelt, find ich gut : " Das Auto war ja auch ne Zeitmaschine". Was in meinem Fall natürlich nicht bedeutet ,das ich da nun alles verstehen muss. Nachvollziebar wirds jedoch mit dem Hinweis auch für mich.


                    Deine Geschichte Teil III lese ich später .
                    Das letzte Treffen der Generationen in Wien war übrigens BOMBE ! Picards Moralkiste:"Schurken, die ihre Schnurrbärte zwirbeln, sind leicht zu erkennen, aber diejenigen, die sich in gute Taten kleiden, sind hervorragend getarnt."

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                      #11
                      Das Stichwort zum Aspekt der verlangsamten Zeit lautet "Zeitdilatation"
                      https://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zeitdilatation
                      Wobei ich die jeweiligen Faktoren der Verzögerung kreativ ergänzt habe... hätte ich diesen Wikipedia-Eintrag mal bloß früher gefunden... Vielleicht passe ich die Zahlen nochmal an.
                      Wer mit den bisherigen Angaben überschlagsmäßig nachgerechnet hat, hat aber inzwischen vielleicht schon eine Idee, in welchem Setting die Geschichte endet.

                      Jetzt wird es fies :-)

                      The prisoner they brought back to „Ranger“ closed many of the numerous gaps in the puzzle that was the Utgardian colony - after they overcame the language barrier, since the prisoner did not speak a single word of english.

                      First, but not foremost, they learned that the distance to Ragnarök apparently had a direct influence on the passage of time. The waiting orbit that took „Ranger“ one time around the black hole until it met up with Hall again had a smaller diameter than Halls orbit around Ragnarök had. As a consequence, during the 15 years measured on „Ranger“, 52 years had passed on Utgard. 52 years in which the colony stabilized, grew and prospered - in some way.

                      The social development of the colony remained an unsolvable riddle. The UPA had already embraced the concept of a classed society decades ago - but facing a society in which genetic heritage made the difference between being part of either a ruling elite or a caste of slaves was still something they felt more than uncomfortable with. Understanding why colonists from the almost pathologically tolerant and liberal FSE created a totalitarian society with more than obvious ideological and aesthetical influences from 20th century NS germany would have required insights to occurrences that took place back on earth only months prior to „Daedalus’“ departure.

                      The neural knowledge induction technique had not been used on earth for two reason - the aspect of its ridiculous inefficiency being the more obvious one. The other aspect was responsible for the method having been actually outlawed. Inducted knowledge could be configured to be dominant - meaning that it would completely override contradicting knowledge - or ethic attitudes and socialization. When what Alfred Rotland, a 31 years old system operator for the NKI system, had done was finally discovered, it was much too late. „Daedalus“ was already on its way, a few historical files had been deleted, cultural, biological and ethical schedule files had been amended. The man who ended his life in a psychiatric clinic had found a way to create a society that thought of him as a mythical Führer and founder, a society that drew a line between one group that was hence considered a superhuman race destined for leadership - and inferior, lesser men born for service. The careful selection of colonists to ensure genetic diversity in the colony that was considered critical for a long term survival of humanity had become irrelevant the moment the ship started. The „power by strength“ doctrine meant that the rulership of the „superhumans“ had to be maintained by force, leading to the immediate implementation of a security caste and the production of adequate weapons to keep the „inferiors“ under control.

                      By the time „Ranger“ started the invasion, most of the first generation colonists had already died of old age. Indoctrination of the second and later generations took place in a more conventional way - but stayed extremely effective. Each and every one of the original colonists had been programmed - be it slave or master - to embrace his role in society. Not only accept, but literally embrace.
                      For many of the „Rangers“, this resulted in a perceived change of the mission. Taking over a helpless colony by force turned into a liberation expedition. Or, from a less idealistic perspective: a fight for survival against a more than equal opponent. After all, the Utgardians did not only turn out to be much better armed than expected… they also had many more soldiers. Even before the „Rangers“ ran in a deathtrap that cost them a third of their military personnel.

                      The „Rangers“ did not have the required resources to build an own colony and had to conquer at least one of the existing settlement clusters. The only chance they saw was an attack with all remaining forces on the clusters center and then taking over one outpost after the other. The significant disadvantage in numbers meant that even if a settlement could be conquered, the „Rangers“ could not spare personnel to permanently defend it afterwards against counterattacks. This slowed the progress of the campaign significantly - and several settlements were just cleared from enemies, but not used yet. They needed to wait until their population had grown sufficiently to actually make use of the infrastructure. The degree of indoctrination of both masters and slaves made the liberation of the Utgardians theoretical desirable - but completely impractical. With this in mind, the invaders set the objectives to securing infrastructure and decimation of the current population. The development of non permanent chemical agents helped much in achieving these goals.

                      A technological advantage in the beginning and especially air superiority allowed the invaders to both push the conquest and defend what they had already taken. However, this meant that the trained soldiers permanently hopped from mission to mission - and all the time, their numbers dwindled further and further. Military service for the civilian settlers was established during the first weeks - but eventually, new specialized recruits had been trained.

                      It took about half a year to secure the first cluster and establish a territory controlled by the invaders. At that time, their military strength had been reduced to little more than a single company - but they consolidated and eventually their population did grow. Both sides concentrated on military development, with the first colonists resorting much on the historical and technological files the arms-enthusiast Rotland had stored in Daedalus’ databases. Growth was significantly slowed by the losses in the conflict - but both sides acted careful enough to limit their own losses.

                      78 years after the invasion, the Heimatverteidigung - as the defenders called their military then - had built a respectable host of tanks and self propelled guns. With limited production capabilities and resources, the Heimatverteidigung valued flexible designs in their equipment. As a result, each tank could quite easily be adjusted to a given situations requirements.

                      The Liberation Force, on the other hand, stuck to their Hit-and-Run doctrine with few light, but fast and hard hitting vehicles and aircraft. However… aircraft that dated back to the landing and that was used and maintained very careful, since the local industry had only then reached a capacity where new aircraft could be produced.

                      In that year, 78 years after the arrival of „Ranger“, a trace of fire in the sky marked the arrival of a spaceship of unknown origin.
                      Zuletzt geändert von ED-209; 27.12.2018, 16:22.

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                        #12
                        Das war nun erst mal das Ende von Teil 3 - Ja, Teil 3 ist länger als die Teile 1 und 2 zusammen.
                        Mit der Überarbeitung von Teil 4 geht es viel zu langsam voran - was vor allem daran liegt, dass ich für jeden Absatz Handlung 2 Absätze Kontext schreibe und die Handlung eben komplett umkremple.

                        Für meinen Geschmack holpert das Ganze schon sehr. Aber andererseits... nein, es wird nicht gespoilert. Wenn Teil 4 hier steht, schreibe ich auch, was Motivation und Ausgangspunkt für das Ganze waren.

                        ich finde es ja schön, wenn es einem Leser hier schon mal gefällt - über Verbesserungsvorschläge würde ich mich aber trotzdem freuen.
                        Hinweise auf sprachliche Macken, stilistische Fehlgriffe, physikalische Ungereimtheiten (z.B. die falschen Faktoren der Zeitdilatation), Inkonsistenzen und schlichtweg dämliche Elemente.

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                          #13
                          Betrachten wir es mal als Einstieg in Teil 4.
                          Es wird schlimmer.

                          Part 4 - Taken

                          The ship crossed the sky and disappeared behind the horizon. Not even one hour later, the fiery dot appeared above the red woods around the oldest - and largest - colony cluster. Rotland. That name was of course no coincidence. Naming the colony after the mythic founder was a bit more than merely suggested by the neural programming the Daedalus colonists had been subject to. That this rural region suitable for a colony was covered with red-leafed, treelike plants appeared just like destiny, adding a duality to the name as the region was indeed a „red land“.

                          As the spark descended on Huninsdorf, a medium sized settlement less than 50 kilometers away from the Rotlands core settlement, sirens woke up and heavy machine guns pivoted up to the descending flying object.

                          It was not the first time the invaders of the LF launched an airborne surprise attack - and all but the smallest settlements had been equipped with at least basic anti air defense weapons. The heavy machine guns previously primarily mounted on towers to keep subhuman inmates in slave camps under control were just as well useable against light aircraft. In theory, they were fit to actually bring down LF-aircraft - and at least damaged them on several occassions. However… enough to make the LF think twice about using their most valuable military assets that could to a certain degree be repaired - but until recently not replaced.

                          To make things worse, those machine guns turned up everywhere in ridiculous amounts. With the enhanced carrying capacity of the new powered Exo Armor worn by more and more of the HV forces, the current patterns of those heavy machine guns had even become standard equipment for most HV-infantrists.

                          As a consequence, the LF usually kept their storm shuttles carefully out of reach of anti air weapons. Following a centuries-long tradition, the HV had given those enemy shuttles an own name: „Aasgeier“ - meaning „vulture“ - had obviously been chosen for propaganda purposes. The HV was oblivious to the fact that the name chosen by the LF was „Condor“. This coincidence was even more unlikely because the actual design of the Condor certainly did not resemble a bald headed scavenger bird and instead a winged dolphin… with a large degree of imagination.

                          Taking all of this, the distance to the front line and the strategic relevance of Huninsdorf into consideration let an attack appear extremely unlikely.

                          And yet, there was that aircraft approaching Huninsdorf at that day - apparently indifferent to the defensive fire. While being roughly the same size as a Condor, it did not even resemble the LF storm shuttle. And last, but not least - it apparently had more firepower than a Condor with gunship loadout. When the last of the four towers harboring the defensive guns finally had burst in a cloud of dust, splinters and blood, the debris of the first had not even touched the ground.

                          Then, it landed right in front of the gate in an obfuscating cloud of dust.

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